Check out the 13 types of Nigerian Dads

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Father’s Day came and we all celebrated our fathers, father figures and single mothers for their father like strength. Now let’s look at 13 different types of Nigerian fathers. I bet you can spot yours below:

  1. The wife beater

Wife beater
This father makes it uncomfortable for you at home and impossible for you to love him. He only knows how to talk with his fists and you watch as he pounds your mother day after day and if you interfere, you get a fair share of the abuse. Worse of all, your mother nurses her wounds and warns you not to talk or complain. She will convince you that this is a version of love. You have to get   help for your mother before he beats her to death. Love is not expressed by beating up your wife, and even if  corrections wants to be made by the husband it can be done without abuse.

  1. The disciplinarianNigerian dad

You have to walk on egg shells with this father in the home. Anything you do wrong, will end in a serious punishment or beating. Stroke of the koboko, lashes of his favourite belt, hot slaps, knocks, he might even make you wash all the plates in the house even when they are all clean  etc, you’ve experienced it all. Anything can set him of from a bad grade to bad behaviour. Good thing is it ends once you’re old enough to leave his house… provided you don’t mess up big time in future, then you will learn you’re not too old to get your ass whooped.

  1. The one who you call ‘sir’

Nigerian dad2

This father makes sure you know he is not your friend and will never be , that he gave birth to you . You may be half of him, but he makes sure that  you treat him like he is your oga. It will be a bit like a military regime: when he talks to you, you stand straight, look him in the eye and address him as sir.

  1. The calm oneNigerian dad 4

To this father, you’re a precious little egg that needs to be cradled and he wouldn’t dare raise his voice at you.  He believes you are still a baby even when you old enough to father a child .And opposites attract so, it’s your mother who will be whipping sense into you occasionally. The plus side is that he will always have the soothing touch or words and when he has the money, shower it on his pet.

  1. The nuturing one
    Nigerian dad 3

This daddy dearest can compete with mothers anywhere. He burps babies, changes diapers, pets you to sleep, reads you bedtime stories, takes you to school he is every woman’s dream! He is super involved in parenting and does everything but breastfeed! This type will secure a good bond with the children and dispels the stereotype of un-involved fathers. Most kids having this type of dads hardly talk  about their mum, because the father is always there.

  1. The supportive dad aka the ‘say yes’ dad
    Nigerian dad 5

Billionaire Femi Otedola with one of his daughters. Want to study whatever the hell you want in school’ Want to travel the world’ Heck, want to drop out of school’ You go! This type of father has got your back 24/7 and is every child’s dream. He understands you are a separate being from him and does not force his ideals on you. He will only advice you on what he feels is right and say where his limits lie, but he will never stop you from living your life. Some of you cannot relate, eyah. This type of dad feels it your life and cant choose for you , he can only guide you in your decisions.

  1. The unsupportive dad

This type of father takes pride in the fact you are half of him and so therefore, you must be 100 per cent like him. What did you say’ You want to do what is outside his plans for you’ Lol, jokes! My friend, you will study what he wants, do all he wants, when he wants and it shall be so till the day he dies or till he changes. Lol, it’s till he dies, he will never change. In fact he controls every step you take, every move you make and even who you hang out with or marry.

  1. The serial cheater
    epa01036605 U.S Playboy magazine founder Hugh Hefner (2-L) with his friends Holly Madison (L), Bridget Marquardt (C) and Kendra Wilkinson as they pose for photos during the 47th Monte Carlo television Festival at the Grimaldi Forum in Monaco, 12 June 2007. EPA/ASM CORBIS OUT

You love your mother but this father will have you questioning your mother’s sanity. He will have different women and you will lose count, plus he doesn’t even hide it. People always spot him with them all over town and your mother ignores it all with a smile on his face and food for him every night. Your mother is not insane my dear, she’s just grinning and bearing the woes and marrying a serial cheater. And would say to herself “Men would always be Men; its a mans world

  1. The drunk/chain smoker
    Nigerian dad 8

All the time you’ve known him, he has a bottle of liquor by his side, in his hands or a cigarette on his lips. He has become the liquor itself, the smell of cigarettes do nothing to you and it’s even the reason you’ve started smoking and drinking. Or maybe the reason you swore to never drink or smoke. That one no concern him sha, he will live his life as he likes.

  1. The tech-savvy dad
    nigerian dad 9

He was rocking Instagram and Facebook before you even knew what they were. He upgrades his phones quicker than anyone you know , tells you the latest news . When you gist with him, he knows all the up to date gadgets and current social media and you can’t compete. Even your friends agree he is cooler than you and more current.

  1. The encyclopedia/dictionary/history guide
    Patrick Obahiagbon

Google does not have anything on this type of father. From when you were young, he was all the research you needed and even till now he can give detailed facts about things no one really knows. Whether it’s an assignment or you just want to be enlightened, this type of father has got your back and with him around, you’ll never be ignorant. Write down most of what he tells you, so you never forget. Your  conversations at home are more like you talking to a professor at school.

  1. The old fashioned dad
    Nigerian dad 10

From forbidding your left hand to prostrating when you greet, this father carefully practices the ways of his ancestors. Whether he is in America or Antarctica, he will still be 100 percent Nigerian. Your clothes are too hip for him, he will never understand your piercing or tattoos and God forbid you have a baby outside marriage’ ha baby mama  You’ll never hear the end of it and he’ll force you to marry because that’s how it is done and to him your time shouldn’t be different.

  1. The Upgradable Dad
    Nigerian dad 11

This father can adapt anywhere. If he goes to America, he switches it up and understands that if he touches you, you can call child support so he let’s you be. You can be free to express yourself as you like and he won’t judge you or force his ideals on you. You can even have a child outside marriage and he’ll still walk.  He simply say its your time enjoy